Following the first season, I developed a slew of awards. Too many, in fact, especially when considering the observed lack of success. I had presented them in groups over a period of days to increase excitement.

What a year it was for the Superbas. A good start — one win, one loss, and one tie — and then it went downhill, and fast — five consecutive losses, a win, and then three more losses to finish strong. But the team had fun, and even avoided a mutiny here and there along the way. (Not bad for an inaugural season.)

Over the next few days, the end-of-season awards will be announced. Each recipient will receive a $100 Buy.com gift card (not really, but play along) available for the purchase of select fitness-related items.

On to the awards. There are eighteen awards (for a 15-man team and a 12-game season; yes, eighteen). The awards will be presented in clusters and in no particular order. If you have any issues with an award’s recipient, consult with your captain, and then go fuck yourself. Until tomorrow…

First set.

Well, here goes…

East Side Player of the Year: Raphael
The east side is all about attitude, and Raphael exhibited a ton of it, highlighted by flashy catches in right field followed by T.O.-style celebrations.

West Side Player of the Year: Brooks
The west side is more subtle and graceful, and no one exemplifies these characteristics more than their captain. Brooks worked his way out of a mid-season slump to finish with a .581 RLS (fifth-best on the team) and was an anchor for the defense.

Comeback Player: Eric
Only one comeback was made this year, so this was pretty much by default. But seriously, Eric came back after his Fairfield-style injury to garner 20 plate appearances (four other players had the same or less). Eric was only 1 plate appearance shy of the cutoff (despite missing more than half the season) and led the team in sacrifice hits.

Ironman: Joe
Joe played in every game this season and was involved in several collisions at the plate. Joe worked hard following a pre-season injury to record the fourth-most plate appearances on the team.

Second set.

Continuing on…

Clutch Player: Jeff
Jeff hit in 9 consecutive games, a franchise record, and is a fixture among the top four in almost every batting statistic category. Jeff batted .529, had 2 triples, and recorded a .743 RLS (fourth-best on the team).

Surprise Player: Kevin
Kevin pitched his way into our hearts but Kevin also led the team in walks and was seventh on the team with a .467 RLS.

Biggest Disappointment: Jason, Bill
This award, nicknamed the “Maximoo Award,” is the most difficult to hand out. But it has to be done (for parity sake). There were really four contenders — Eric with his injury, Ted with his slump, Jason with his loyalty complex, and Bill with his attendance issues. In order to make the decision… consult the stats. Only one player had fewer plate appearances than Jason’s 14 (Bill’s 13). Jason was the first player to strikeout this season after refusing to take batting practice. (And for that, I salute you…) On the upside, these two guys combined for an almost .600 batting average, a 2/3 on-base percentage, a 1.000 slugging percentage and a 1.000 RLS. On the downside, the two combined for a measly .370 TRP. Jason and Bill managed to only score 7 runs this season, one of which came on Jason’s home run (which, coincidentally, was the first ever in franchise history).

Rutherford B. Hayes Award For Excellence In The Field Of Unadulterated Support: Dom No. 24
First, a little background information on Mr. Hayes. Hayes was born and raised in the state of Ohio before becoming governor and was only one of four U.S. presidents to have won the Oval Office without winning the popular election. (J.Q. Adams, Benjamin Harrison and sitting-president G.W. Bush are the other three.) Hayes promised to only serve one term and that he did. Hayes was also the first sitting president to visit the west coast. But on to Dom. We had one true fan this season, and that was Dom No. 24. (I am unsure of Dom’s last name, so from now on, it is “Dom No. 24.”) Without Dom, would we have won the two games we did? (Hard to tell.)

Third set.

More awards…

Copper Gloves: Wright, Andy, Carlo, Jeff [myself], Craig
Copper Gloves, the Red-Legged Superbas version of the Gold Glove awards, are given to two outfielders, two infielders, and an additional player from any position that exhibited “defensive brilliance” during the course of the season. The Superbas may not have scored many runs, but their defense at times was stellar, thanks to these guys. Infielders Andy and Jeff [myself], outfielders Wright and Craig, and pitcher Carlo did their best to keep the Superbas within striking distance, and it showed. Bravo.

Lifetime Achievement: Ted
We only know one thing for sure: we could not have done any of this without Ted. (Money, money, money… money.) And, needless to say, he probably has the longest list of better things to do out of all of us…

Fourth and last set.

And finally…

Most Improved Player: Jesús
Maybe it was the brand new glove, or maybe, just maybe, it was skill and hard work. As the Concord crowd chanted harmoniously, “Hey-shoo, Hey-shoo,” Jesús played solid defense and batted .417.

Top Offensive Player: Andy
There is little doubt to whom the “opie” should go to when you see Andy’s offensive numbers. The East Side captain led the team in RBI and doubles, batted .550, and recorded a hefty .870 RLS and sick .609 TRP.

Top Defensive Player: Brooks
Brooks achieved defensive player of the game honors four times and easily earns the “dopie.” The steadfast West Side captain anchored the defense over the course of a somewhat tumultuous inaugural season.

Most Outstanding Player: Carlo
This one was easy. Carlo led the team in triples, batting average, on-base percentage, slugging percentage, the RLS and TRP. If there was a triple crown winner, Carlo was it. Carlo also pitched well and became a third middle-infielder, swallowing up several hard hit balls up the middle.

Our second game of the second season, and fourteenth overall, was another humiliating loss, 21 to 9.

• I’ll be in Philadelphia for some brotherly love the rest of this week so I’ve posted the remaining schedule and the current standings in the Strikeout for Beer Keg Fundraiser a little earlier than usual. Of course, what is “usual”?
• We strung together a few runs last night at different times, but we need balance throughout the batting order. Our top six hitters accounted for 12 of 15 hits and all 9 runs.
• We are the away team next game so let’s start the game off with a few runs and play with a lead (for a change).
• I’m always open for ideas on the lineup or defensive positioning, so if you have an opinion, please let me know. If you’d prefer to remain anonymous, you can contact me through the Email the Coach feature on the website.
• I will begin developing a base coach code of conduct.
• The new scorecard was a huge success.
• Why is it that ten players on this team are from one company, and we cannot get that company to sponsor us? If you are a higher-up at said company, get your ass in gear. (The result would be a lot more beer.)
• If you have lady-friends, please bring them to the ballgames. If you have cougar friends, that’d be even better.
• Before the game yesterday, a player denounced my opening game lineup with Joe as the leadoff hitter, and then went 0 for 3 in last night’s game.
• There is a bar in the plaza across the street from the Willow Pass Fields complex at Willow Pass and East Olivera. A few of us were there after last night’s game discussing pygmy goats. Don’t miss out on these priceless opportunities for higher thought.
• Our next game is at 6:15pm, with soft-toss BP and warm-ups at 5:45pm. How many players will show up?

The team didn’t get a lot of participation at the optional practices, but I tried to base the lineups on those that showed up. After the final practice before the second season started (we would have no in-season practices) I tried to maintain my fleeting authority.

Our next practice is scheduled for 10am at Willow Pass Fields No. 4 or 5 (the fields farthest north) on Saturday, April 7. This will be the last practice before our first game on the tenth. We had a pathetic showing this past weekend — five players — and unless you plan to start the season on a ligament-tearing rampage, you will most likely suck unless you warm up your arm and swing a bat. (Yes, I mean you.)

That being said, I have established a tentative opening day defensive lineup (based on players who have come to practice).

In order to improve our player profiles, please send me your measurements. If you are married, please send me your wife’s measurements as well. (All information is helpful.)

I have established April 9 as the deadline for registration dues, so if you haven’t paid by the day before the first game, you are a deadbeat, and therefore, off the team. I understand this may be portrayed as a harsh tactic, but this team has a reputation to uphold (in the eyes of the cougars of Concord, and we shall not disappoint).

Some people may ask, “hey Coach, were you high when you wrote this?” and I assure you I’m not, but I have been in the sun all day, and that reminds me, if you are ever in the mood for an impromptu moonlight stroll along the railroad tracks, I know this person who is looking for a walking partner. If you are interested, check out his website at walkingpartner.com.

That is all.

I had officially started the Coach’s Notes blog posts on April 12, 2007, following the first game of the second season, our thirteenth overall, and a game we lost 24 to 3.

• So, it wasn’t our best game; there is certainly a lot of room for improvement. (As Jesus said, “I’ll be back,” or whatever.)
• Our goal for this season is six wins, which may put us in the playoffs, and I do think that that is possible. We had a lot of players miss the first game, and we will get stronger as the season progresses. Typically, teams that do well on opening day are teams that have been together for some time. This was true on Tuesday night; the Brewskis have been together for five years.
• Walks are good. I am a big culprit of this as well, but let’s try to always take a strike before swinging away. First, you’ll get an eye for the pitcher’s delivery. Second, the pitcher may end up giving you a free pass to first base. Many teams in the league base their entire offense on walks, and although I don’t agree with that philosophy (as my saying goes, “only postal workers walk”), it is definitely better than popping out to the first baseman or grounding out to the pitcher, especially on the first pitch. (Remember, three balls gives you a walk, and two strikes and you’re out.)
• The second baseman needs to play deeper and more towards the middle; the first baseman needs to play off the line. This is not true in all cases, e.g., a pull left-hander, but we need coverage up the middle. The throw from second to first is very short.
• It is the second baseman’s job to position the rightfielder. The rightfielder should play up, generally, but the rightfielder will heed to the direction of the second baseman.
• The third baseman is the captain of the infield on cutoffs. It is the third baseman’s job to position the shortstop or second baseman and let them know where to throw the ball. “ONE” = first base; “TWO” = second base; “THREE” = third base; “FOUR” = home; and “CUT” = no throw. The third baseman should shout this repeatedly and give the cutoff man enough time to catch-and-throw in a fluid motion.
• The league-provided scorecard sucks, I realize, so I created our own branded scorecard, which we will use from now on. It includes call-outs for a single, double, triple, home run, walk, reached-on-error, sacrifice hit and fielder’s choice. All you need to do is circle the appropriate one. There is also a place to write-in the number of RBIs. (Pretty simple.) Hopefully this will make keeping score easier for the folks who claim to not know how to. One question for you folks: When you are watching a ballgame, and the announcer says the team just turned a “6-4-3 double play,” are you telling me you do not know what that means? (Just asking.)
• I am keeping track and I have calculated the statistics, but I will not post them until the sixth game or so. Before then, the numbers are essentially meaningless. I will also post the definitions of the two statistics I’ve created — the contribution percentage (or Red-Legged Superbas Index, RLS) and the Total Run Production Index (TRP) — when the time comes. In the meantime, the explanation of all statistics is available.
• Please don’t try to phone me the hour before the game; I am most likely warming up or whatever, and I will not pick up my phone. In all likelihood, whatever information you need is available on the blog, so print it out as necessary.
• If you need batting practice, do it. Don’t say to me after the game, “we need batting practice.” No, you need batting practice.

I think this is a perfect introduction to my “voice” as coach of the Red-Legged Superbas, or simply “Superbas” for short.

There was very often too much going on during the games for me to react sufficiently, or appropriately, and it wasn’t until afterward — the following day sitting at my computer — that I was able to digest what had occurred, and figure out how to address the team.

We were not a good team, and that fact began to wear mightily on me. During one game in the first season, I took out my frustration unfortunately on the rest of the players, some of whom didn’t deserve it. The following day, June 15, 2006, I sent an email to the team.

I prefaced the email first with another email — the subject, “Upcoming: A message from the coach.” — giving players advanced warning of the important words to follow. “Approximate run time: 10 minutes.”

Team-

First of all, I would like to briefly apologize if I was abrasive or overly aggressive during last night’s game. There is no excuse; however, I see great things for this team (actually, I don’t), and my style may be too harsh. I had a great time last night — I went 3 for 4, hit 2 doubles and scored 3 runs — and I play more effective when I am “in-your-face.” However, that may not be the case for everyone on the team and I realize that. On a related matter, I would like to win these games, and have fun, and if you would rather have fun, that is fine by me, the more beer the better, but then please do not be frustrated when we lose. (In my personal history, that is how it is. I have always had hard-leaning coaches, we always had fun, and we always won.)

I do believe we can all play harder, with more heart, and with a greater determination to become better ballplayers (i.e., learn the game, not make a mockery of it), win games and have fun as a result. It is possible. Remember team rule number 7: “Winning is more important than remaining friends.” (Maybe I take that rule too seriously.)

Alas, we are on a five-game losing streak. So it goes… [K.V.]

TEAM CAPTAINS

Now, let’s get down to business. As a means to streamline pregame activities and possible midweek practices, we will now have two captains.

The Captain of the West Side will be Brooks; the following will report to Brooks: Ted, Eric, Kevin, Jesús, Jason and Joe. The Captain of the East Side will be Andy; the following will report to Andy: Carlo, Bill, Jeff, Craig, Wright and Raphael.

The captains will report to me. I report to Jesus of Nazareth.

The responsibilities of the captains will be to run pre-game activities (soft-toss, getting arms warmed, and stretching for the older folks), being liaisons with the umps before and during the games, ensuring that base coaches are present at all times, gathering emotional support on the field and in the dugout, scheduling any mid-week practices, and assisting the coach with the lineup before and during the game (but never after).

And God saw that it was good.

KEG FUND

Wright struck out yesterday, raising money for a great charity event: the Strikeout for Beer Keg Fundraiser. For every strikeout a player records, he will donate $20 to the fund. Because of Wright’s generosity, we now have $120 in the fund, well on our way to a keg of fine beer and meat to grill. Let us all be more philanthropic in the future.

JEFF

Lastly, Jeff is a moron (although he surely can hit the ball). He wasn’t born a moron, he isn’t always a moron, but last night, he was indeed a moron (and you can substitute “a$$hole” for “moron”). He owes the team a half-dozen softballs as a result of his home-run derby showcase with the short left-field fence; what was it, 120 feet? (Jeff: these softballs are available at several locations throughout the bay area, including your hometown of Concord. Please contact Vice President of Operations, Joe, if you have questions.)

Well, that being said, we only have four more games, and we are mathematically out of the playoff. Let’s try to finish the year on a high note.

And I promise to relax more if everyone plays better.

Later.

For two summers I ran a beer-league softball team. We were known as the Red-Legged Superbas. The name didn’t stick right away, but players would soon learn to honor it, and a few even came to pronounce it correctly.

We were not good by any measure. And losing was no fun. With all honesty, it was one of the most horrible experiences of my adult life.

I ran a team blog, and outside of the more typical postings (schedules, statistics and game recaps), I crafted a voice as the coach and general manager of the team, with musings on the game and, at times, even the broader sense of life.

My rein as coach was needlessly tumultuous. There was a near uprising near the middle, and I was even forced to suspend myself for one game toward the end. The players didn’t respect me for some reason. I was younger than most of them. I was a better player. And I wasn’t the most pleasant of human beings when we were losing (which was constant). None of this made for a good combination. An eruption of some sort always seemed imminent.

But I was able to keep the team together — without winning — and a lot of that has to do with the blog. It provided a narrative to our humble, grievous lives on the softball field. It brought people together.

This project collects the highlights of the blog — the posts I called “Coach’s Notes.” No one seemed to listen. And I cared too much.