- Well, we finished the season 0-12, which took me totally by surprise coming into the season, and although we did have our fair share of bad luck — losing D-Grace at the half-way mark and having Quinonez play only one game, among others — we were much better than our record. I still believe that.
– We played our best game defensively last game; that is encouraging.
– We had two no-shows for our last game, Ghalambor and Cole, who have become a duet of deadbeats.
– During this off-season, I will update the website, finalizing and archiving all the gamelogs, player pages, and statistics. I will post the updates as they are completed.
– We are moving forward with the fall league. I will post on that issue shortly.
– I’ve gone through the seasonal awards, and I’ve reduced the total number accordingly. Being such, the awards will mean a lot more this season. Last year, we handed out 18 awards (for a 15-person team and a 12-game season). This season, I’m leaning more towards 12 to 14, and not everyone will earn an award, unlike last year. (A cursory explanation of awards is available.)
– Speaking of awards, I will be sending PayPal requests to players who donated graciously into the Strikeout for Beer Keg Fundraiser. Please pay promptly.
– Keep your weekends open in August for the banquet. Does Saturday, August 18, sound good to people? Or Sunday, August 19?
-Jeff
Monthly Archives: July 2007
Superbas Game 024-20070717
Game Summary
The Superbas ended their second season with a disastrous 0-12 record on Tuesday evening. The Superbas played their best game defensively, allowing only eight runs to the first-place Pit Crew. However, the Superbas matched their best defensive game with their worst offensive game in team history, garnering only one run on eight hits. The final score: Pit Crew 8, Superbas 1.
Second baseman Andy Orr played well defensively and pitcher Brooks Ramsdell pitched a gem. Several great plays were made in the outfield by outfielders Jesus Espinoza, Chris Leo and Tim Evans.
The game could have potentially come down to one swing if it were not for four consecutive errors in the last defensive inning for the Superbas. With the game knotted at 5-1 with two outs, the four next plays saw Ramsdell failing to cover first on a routine ground ball, first baseman Eric Grace dropping an easy throw from Orr at second, Orr bobbling a grounder between first and second, and a ball going under shortstop Jeff Wisniewski’s glove on a grounder up the middle.
Orr and Wisniewski each singled twice and drew a walk. With the bases loaded and two outs in the last inning, Evans popped out weakly to the first baseman, ending the season and cementing the pitiful legacy of this year’s Superbas team.
Ramsdell struck out looking in the third.
Defensive Player of the Game: Andy Orr.
Offensive Players of the Game: Andy Orr (2-3, BB, R) and Jeff Wisniewski (2-3, BB).
Box Score
Inning-by-Inning
1st Inning.
Leo popped out to second.
Grace flied out to center.
Orr singled.
Wisniewski singled. Orr to second.
Evans flied out to left.
2nd Inning.
Ramsdell grounded out to second.
Atiyeh singled.
Gray singled. Atiyeh to second.
Espinoza popped out to short.
Leo grounded into fielder’s choice to short. Gray out.
3rd Inning.
Grace grounded out to second.
Orr singled.
Wisniewski singled. Orr to second.
Evans singled. Orr scored. Wisniewski to second.
Ramsdell struck out looking.
Atiyeh flied out to left.
4th Inning.
Gray lined out to the pitcher.
Espinoza grounded out to short.
Leo flied out to left.
5th Inning.
Grace flied out to center.
Orr flied out to left.
Wisniewski grounded out to third.
6th Inning.
Evans popped out to short.
Ramsdell walked.
Atiyeh flied out to left.
Gray grounded into fielder’s choice to short. Ramsdell out.
7th Inning.
Espinoza singled.
Leo flied out to center.
Grace flied out to right.
Orr walked. Espinoza to second.
Wisniewski walked. Espinoza to third. Orr to second.
Evans popped out to first.
End of game.
Coach’s Notes — Game 23
- We played great last game. A few more players, and we would have won. Of course, we played against a bunch of geriatrics, and we should have won anyway.
– Yesterday’s no-shows: Kevin Ghalambor and Wright Cole. Not cool. We had eight players. One of you two must be educated enough to make a call. Maybe not.
– Tim Evans told the waitress last night at the higher thought sessions at Bambino’s that I had come out of the closet that day. What Tim didn’t tell her was that I came out of his closet.
– Immediately following next week’s game, I will send out invoices for the Strikeout for Beer Keg Fundraiser. You will have thirty days to render payment. After that, someone will be paid to kill you.
– I wanted to take a brief moment and discuss the spam email issue. It has come to my attention that a few players, if not all, were on the receiving end of spam directed to superbas.org. I have been receiving this spam all along, but I didn’t think much of it because of the large number of spam email I receive everyday. I failed to recognize that it may have landed in your inbox as well. I first want to ensure you that, no, I did not sell your email addresses for a penny or two, nor do I run an insecure website. These emails are generated by automated spam programs, or “spambots,” that crawl the web, much like Google or Yahoo! do, but instead of culling search keywords, the spambots cull email addresses. So, every time I post coach@superbas.org on the blog, which I do every week in the “next game” post, these spambots pick it up. And that is what happened to the team email address (team@superbas.org). I created the team email address, as well as other email addresses for the east and west sides, etc., so I could send an email to everyone without cherry-picking through my address book. But now that almost everyone is subscribed to the blog, and that I communicate almost exclusively through the blog, I have no need for the team email addresses, so I eliminated all of them. That should take care of the problem. However, if you do get a spam email directed to superbas.org, please forward it to me at coach@superbas.org, and I will investigate. Once again, I apologize for my shortsightedness on this issue.
– We have only one more game, so let’s end the season on a good note.
– Who is interested in the fall league? Wednesdays?
– Tim Evans is thinking late August for the Superbas summer banquet.
-Jeff
Superbas Game 023-20070710
Game Summary
The Superbas showed some offensive might in what ended up being a tough 24-18 loss to Censored on Tuesday evening. The Superbas belted 23 hits for a season-high 18 runs.
Last year’s MOP Carlo Quinonez returned to the mound for the first time this season. In a sign of solidarity, all Superbas players shaved their nutsacks in support of their pitching god. Jeff Wisniewski played well at four positions, including a jaw-dropping diving play at second in the first, which was followed by a cougar-filled standing ovation. Outfielder Chris Leo and first baseman Eric Grace made crowd-pleasing catches, and rightfielder Joe Gray played solid.
All Superbas players had at least two hits, everyone scored at least one run, and all but one registered an RBI. Leo scored three times, knocked in four, and was a home run shy of a cycle. Wisniewski and outfielder Tim Evans had four hits apiece, and combined for 7 runs batted-in. Gray and Quinonez each added three hits and three runs scored. Third baseman Mike Atiyeh tripled.
Defensive Player of the Game: Jeff Wisniewski.
Offensive Players of the Game: Chris Leo (3-5, 2B, 3B, 3 R, 4 RBI), Tim Evans (4-6, 2B, 2 R, 3 RBI), Jeff Wisniewski (4-6, 2B, 3B, 3 R, 4 RBI) and Joe Gray (3-5, 2B, 3 R, 2 RBI).
Box Score
Inning-by-Inning
1st Inning.
Quinonez grounded out to third.
Espinoza popped out to short.
Wisniewski grounded out to short.
2nd Inning.
Evans popped out to short.
Leo lined a single to right.
Grace flied out to right.
Atiyeh flied out to center.
3rd Inning.
Gray singled.
Quinonez singled. Gray to second.
Espinoza popped out to second.
Wisniewski tripled. Gray and Quinonez scored.
Evans singled. Wisniewski scored.
Leo lined out to left.
Grace popped out to second.
4th Inning.
Atiyeh tripled.
Gray singled. Atiyeh scored.
Quinonez singled. Gray to third on throwing error.
Espinoza singled. Gray scored. Quinonez to third.
Wisniewski singled. Espinoza to second.
Evans singled. Quinonez scored. Espinoza to third. Wisniewski to second.
Leo grounded into fielder’s choice to second. Espinoza scored. Evans out. Wisniewski scored on a throwing error.
Grace doubled. Leo scored.
Atiyeh popped out to third.
Gray grounded out to short.
5th Inning.
Quinonez lined out to short.
Espinoza singled.
Wisniewski singled. Espinoza to second.
Evans singled. Espinoza scored. Wisniewski to second.
Leo doubled. Wisniewski and Evans scored.
Grace flied out to center.
Atiyeh singled. Leo scored.
Gray popped out to the pitcher.
6th Inning.
Quinonez grounded out to the pitcher.
Espinoza flied out to right.
Wisniewski flied out to left.
7th Inning.
Evans singled.
Leo tripled. Evans scored.
Grace singled. Leo scored.
Atiyeh popped out to the catcher.
Gray doubled. Grace scored.
Quinonez singled.
Espinoza popped out to the catcher.
Wisniewski doubled. Gray and Quinonez scored.
Evans flied out to left.
End of game.
Chris Richards (goodtimes93)
July 10, 2007
[08:36] goodtimes93: あなたの卓越性はどれも棒でない!!!!!!!!!!
[08:36] goodtimes93: means
[08:36] goodtimes93: “Your excellence is bar none”
[08:36] goodtimes93: !!!!!!!!!! times over
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: hello
[08:37] goodtimes93: Greetings J.W.
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: c.r.?
[08:37] goodtimes93: you better believe it
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: how u doing
[08:37] goodtimes93: Good man
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: good to hear
[08:37] goodtimes93: I have all my san fran stuff sorted
[08:37] goodtimes93: how r u doing
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: im good
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: my ass is sore
[08:38] goodtimes93: hahahahahahahahahahahaha
[08:38] goodtimes93: hey man, no questions asked.
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: nice to be off the road
[08:38] goodtimes93: yes, it is.
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: im sure
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: but u miss the burgers too
[08:38] goodtimes93: HELL YES
[08:38] goodtimes93: dude
[08:39] prefidentBUSH: is that japanese?
[08:39] goodtimes93: yes
[08:39] prefidentBUSH: you speak?
[08:39] goodtimes93: absolutely not
[08:39] prefidentBUSH: how?
[08:39] goodtimes93: www.altavista.com
[08:39] goodtimes93: GREAT site
[08:39] prefidentBUSH: haha
[08:39] goodtimes93: Babel fish is KEY
[08:39] goodtimes93: when you plug translated stuff back in- it is hilarious
[08:40] goodtimes93: you can tell your lady you love her in a variety of fashions
[08:40] prefidentBUSH: textually
[08:41] goodtimes93: well, yes
[08:41] goodtimes93: cards etc
[08:41] prefidentBUSH: your more thoughtful than i
[08:41] prefidentBUSH: never thougt of that
[08:41] goodtimes93: I enjoy sexual intercourse more than anything else
[08:41] prefidentBUSH: jesus krist
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: now i have to burn this im thread
[08:42] goodtimes93: oh please
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: actually that is phunny
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: i know this guy
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: chris richards
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: his saying is…
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: I enjoy sexual intercourse more than anything else
[08:43] goodtimes93: hahahaha
[08:43] goodtimes93: its true!
[08:43] prefidentBUSH: which must be why you are really happy to be off of a two-man road trip
[08:43] goodtimes93: Dude, you have no idea
[08:43] prefidentBUSH: or sad, either way, it’s cool
[08:43] goodtimes93: Tim just kind of lays there
[08:44] goodtimes93: soooo boring
[08:44] prefidentBUSH: jesus krist
[08:44] prefidentBUSH: now i have to burn this im thread
[08:44] goodtimes93: yeah, NOW you def do
[08:44] goodtimes93: In lighter news
[08:44] goodtimes93: I am sending my resume to local prisons
[08:45] prefidentBUSH: for teaching
[08:45] goodtimes93: yes
[08:45] goodtimes93: GED and RE-entry classes
[08:45] goodtimes93: Art depending on the inst.
[08:46] prefidentBUSH: prison art
[08:46] prefidentBUSH: like tattoos
[08:46] goodtimes93: I was thinking finger painting and clay
[08:46] goodtimes93: I dont even think they can have pencils
[08:48] prefidentBUSH: yea, clay is cool
[08:48] prefidentBUSH: pipes, etc
[08:48] goodtimes93: hmmm
[08:48] goodtimes93: no clay
[08:49] prefidentBUSH: clay hardens to be rock-like, but fracturable
[08:49] goodtimes93: I dont want to be responsible for drug use or a bludgening
[08:50] prefidentBUSH: makes good smoking pipes, though. homemade, safe, clean.
[08:50] prefidentBUSH: lightly toast the outside following a soaking seals in the flavor and strength
[08:50] goodtimes93: and its non-toxic so if you have to eat the evidence… no worries!
[08:50] prefidentBUSH: i can imagine the prison warden…
[08:50] goodtimes93: lol
[08:50] prefidentBUSH: “who the fuck brought the clay ?!?”
[08:52] goodtimes93: that is hilarious
[08:53] goodtimes93: Ok, I am going to go to the beach
[08:53] goodtimes93: relax before my class starts tomorrow
[08:53] goodtimes93: and then I have many a hot date with Mr. Marx and his buddies
[08:53] goodtimes93: Karl that is
[08:53] prefidentBUSH: later
July 30, 2007
[12:51] goodtimes93: Greetings Sir.
[12:51] goodtimes93: I have an update
[12:51] prefidentBUSH: kay
[12:51] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Bailey does not like tractors.
[12:51] goodtimes93: Besides Bailey’s disdain for tractors, Dwight and winged creatures,
[12:51] goodtimes93: Your pictures and video have been found and shall be sent by day’s end EST
[12:53] prefidentBUSH: awesome
[12:53] prefidentBUSH: how big?
[12:53] goodtimes93: the pictures can be sent in an email or two
[12:53] prefidentBUSH: um, let me clarify before u answer
[12:53] goodtimes93: via hotmail
[12:53] goodtimes93: HA
[12:54] goodtimes93: the video I will post on YOUTUBE
[12:54] goodtimes93: b/c its way too big to email
[12:54] prefidentBUSH: how big?
[12:54] goodtimes93: a couple of “Megs”
[12:54] goodtimes93: my camera takes BIG pictures
[12:55] prefidentBUSH: i can recieve a couple megs
[12:55] goodtimes93: lol
[12:55] prefidentBUSH: or u can ftp
[12:55] goodtimes93: I’m sure you can flyboy
[12:55] prefidentBUSH: i despise youtube
[12:55] goodtimes93: OK
[12:55] prefidentBUSH: and my likeness on such disgust
[12:55] goodtimes93: Ill see if my temple account will allow me to send large files
[12:56] prefidentBUSH: also try dropsend.com or yousendit.com (both are free)
[12:56] goodtimes93: Oh wow
[12:56] goodtimes93: OK
[12:56] prefidentBUSH: allow you to send large files through there website, and then i have 30 days to download
[12:56] prefidentBUSH: yea, the world is truning
[12:56] prefidentBUSH: turning
[12:57] goodtimes93: The world IS turning
[12:57] goodtimes93: excellent observation
[12:57] goodtimes93: Today, I freed a fly who tell tales of Cake Island
[12:57] prefidentBUSH: im not into poetry or gary or anything
[12:57] prefidentBUSH: gay
[12:57] prefidentBUSH: not gary
[12:58] goodtimes93: GARY
[12:58] goodtimes93: lol
[12:58] goodtimes93: hahahahahahaha
[12:58] goodtimes93: i did free a fly!
[12:58] goodtimes93: and if you were a fly, a 13×9 cake is like an island!
[12:58] goodtimes93: an island of deliciousness
[12:59] goodtimes93: I made it for my lover
[12:59] prefidentBUSH: um.
[12:59] goodtimes93: I guess some of us are too busy saving the “environment”
[13:00] goodtimes93: I will let you go
[13:00] goodtimes93: check your mail tonight/tomorrow AM
[13:05] prefidentBUSH: cool
[13:05] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Finishing my paper.
And by finishing my paper I mean youtubing Lionel Richie and laughing at the video for “Hello.”
There are seldom events funnier than a black man singing “is it me you are looking for” to a blind chick half his age.
[13:05] prefidentBUSH: later
August 22, 2007
[09:41] prefidentBUSH: dude
[09:41] prefidentBUSH: where’s the loot
[09:41] goodtimes93: yar
[09:41] prefidentBUSH: uve got time off
[09:41] prefidentBUSH: i know
[09:41] goodtimes93: dude, good question
[09:41] goodtimes93: its ON here
[09:41] goodtimes93: i loaded it
[09:41] goodtimes93: but there aren’t thumbnails just file names
[09:42] goodtimes93: you are dealing with “a fucking retard”
[09:42] prefidentBUSH: haha
[09:42] prefidentBUSH: hopeless?
[09:42] goodtimes93: Corky is light years away from me technically
[09:42] goodtimes93: nay
[09:42] goodtimes93: the only thing that is hopeless is the word itself
[09:42] goodtimes93: there is always hope
[09:43] prefidentBUSH: i’m off for a baseball game tonite at san francisco with bronosn, remember the guy?
[09:43] prefidentBUSH: bronson
[09:43] goodtimes93: YES
[09:43] prefidentBUSH: should be a good time, as always
[09:44] goodtimes93: he is one of my favorite personalities in America
[09:44] goodtimes93: I showed my love interest his website
[09:44] goodtimes93: BHBJ is a living legend
[09:44] prefidentBUSH: haha
[09:44] goodtimes93: If techno music were a person, it would be he
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: yea, he threw a kickass party last weekend
[09:45] goodtimes93: i can not even imagine
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: at his cabin in napa woods
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: crazy
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: live band, clog dancer, chicks
[09:45] goodtimes93: guest list:
[09:45] goodtimes93: Puff the magic dragon
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: real chicks
[09:45] goodtimes93: The guy from the monopoly game
[09:45] prefidentBUSH: http://www.flickr.com/photos/reyonthehill/1150583808/
[09:46] prefidentBUSH: got stoned and tripped my balls off on shrooms
[09:46] prefidentBUSH: fuckin ridurous
[09:46] goodtimes93: I would not be surprised to see fictional characters, in real life, at one of his get downs
[09:46] goodtimes93: like Fred Flinstone
[09:46] prefidentBUSH: ridicurous
[09:46] prefidentBUSH: haha
[09:46] goodtimes93: CHICKENS
[09:46] goodtimes93: WTF
[09:46] goodtimes93: ????
[09:46] goodtimes93: Jesus
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: it was a hoe-down
[09:47] goodtimes93: Clearly
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: througha nd through
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: he didint know what to do with the chicks afterwards
[09:47] goodtimes93: yeah I bet
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: i said, “emilia would like them”
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: “they stay small forever like that, irght”
[09:47] prefidentBUSH: right?
[09:47] goodtimes93: hahahahahaha
[09:47] goodtimes93: dude, they get fucking huge
[09:48] prefidentBUSH: and bhbj said, “oh yea, they stay small and cute forever.”
[09:48] prefidentBUSH: “i think this is a great idea, bring them home to emilia.”
[09:48] goodtimes93: oh my god
[09:48] goodtimes93: you didnt
[09:48] prefidentBUSH: that was close
[09:48] prefidentBUSH: i was going to feed them to haley
[09:48] goodtimes93: you fucker
[09:48] goodtimes93: you are like Michael Vick
[09:49] goodtimes93: what if they were attack chickens
[09:49] goodtimes93: and kicked Haley’s ass?
[09:49] prefidentBUSH: they were too small
[09:49] prefidentBUSH: but i didn’t bring them home anyway
[09:49] goodtimes93: you would be surprised man
[09:49] prefidentBUSH: im not sure what the chicks fate was
[09:49] goodtimes93: like velacaraptors
[09:49] goodtimes93: I am sure they are in a better place
[09:49] prefidentBUSH: haha
[09:50] goodtimes93: and Haley is lucky
[09:50] goodtimes93: dude, you should have kept them
[09:50] goodtimes93: they are REALLY noisy too
[09:50] prefidentBUSH: you know a lot about chicks
[09:50] goodtimes93: let them loose in a building
[09:50] goodtimes93: I live next to a farm
[09:50] goodtimes93: i am one with the land
[09:51] goodtimes93: 4-H is my shit
[09:51] goodtimes93: although my art lacked a ribbon at this year’s grange fair
[09:51] goodtimes93: I just think it went over their heads
[09:51] prefidentBUSH: speaking of which…
[09:51] prefidentBUSH: in the news…
[09:51] prefidentBUSH: Are chicken coops the next battleground in the war on terror?
[09:52] goodtimes93: HAHAHAAHAHHAHA
[09:52] prefidentBUSH: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20387611/
[09:52] goodtimes93: Jesus
[09:52] goodtimes93: ATTACK CHICKENS
[09:52] goodtimes93: My psychic powers are in high gear today
[09:53] goodtimes93: I have to go photograph the beach for my next painting
[09:53] goodtimes93: Dude, my girlfriend asked me to paint her the ocean
[09:53] goodtimes93: No pressure on that one
[09:54] prefidentBUSH: good luck
[09:54] goodtimes93: hey thanks man
[09:54] goodtimes93: you have inspired my away message J-Bone
[09:55] prefidentBUSH: now i feel gay
[09:55] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) A defining element of humanity is the ability to explore what has already been discovered and find something new.
[09:55] prefidentBUSH: … really gay.
September 5, 2007
[10:55] prefidentBUSH: i put together a music video of the sf giants game. it is really long, almost 19 minutes, longer than most porn movies, or at least longer than most porn movies keep your attention, “that’s enough already, put your clothes back on, and shower.” i added some trippy music for the bh bronson mansion scenes.
[10:55] prefidentBUSH: http://www.emilia-jeffrey.com/blog/2007/09/night-at-ballpark-iii.htm
[10:59] goodtimes93: http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/cas/413276856.html
[10:59] prefidentBUSH: i can’t open that at work, can u email me a pic of the screen… jeff@reycorp.com
[11:00] goodtimes93: oh dude
[11:00] goodtimes93: nonono
[11:00] goodtimes93: DO NOT OPEN THAT AT WORK
[11:00] prefidentBUSH: yea, it says “Filtered: SEX”
[11:00] goodtimes93: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
[11:00] prefidentBUSH: “This has been logged by admin staff.”
[11:00] prefidentBUSH: “Expect a firing.”
[11:00] goodtimes93: oh no
[11:00] goodtimes93: shut up
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: it did stop the site from opening, but nothing will ahppen
[11:01] goodtimes93: o ok good
[11:01] goodtimes93: dude
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: “Um, Jeff, we would like to speak with you…”
[11:01] goodtimes93: if they actually saw the link
[11:01] goodtimes93: you would be committed
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: “It seems your internet activity includes…”
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: “casual encounters in Philadelphia.”
[11:02] goodtimes93: hahaha
[11:02] goodtimes93: on company time and money no less
[11:02] goodtimes93: “Well Sir, I would hardly call my encounter, ‘casual.'”
[11:03] prefidentBUSH: send me a image of the screen, im interested now
[11:03] prefidentBUSH: but not in that way
[11:04] goodtimes93: your secret is safe w me
[11:04] goodtimes93: Dude
[11:04] goodtimes93: i cant even email pictures let alone do a screen shot
[11:04] goodtimes93: i emailed you the link
[11:04] goodtimes93: that pushes my limits
[11:04] prefidentBUSH: ctr-alt-printscreen
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: ctrl-v to paste
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: then send
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: — alright, i’ll check it at home, in the confines of my personal office
[11:06] goodtimes93: yeah
[11:06] goodtimes93: and close the door man
[11:06] goodtimes93: your wife will start crying
[11:07] prefidentBUSH: hahash
[11:07] goodtimes93: All I will say is
[11:07] goodtimes93: I responded to the ad
[11:08] prefidentBUSH: u see, now what am i supposed to do, just sit here wondering waht the fuck your talking about.
[11:08] prefidentBUSH: just copy-paste the text of the ad
[11:09] goodtimes93: OK
[11:09] goodtimes93: but the picture makes it
[11:09] goodtimes93: IT DOESNT GET BETTER THAN SEX WITH A CLOWN. SQUEAKING RED NOSE. SMEARED SMILES AND FACE PAINT. ANIMAL SHAPED BALLOONS. HELL, YOU CAN STICK THEM UP MY ASS IF YOU WANT. I NEED A GOOD FUCK. SO PLEASE, RESPONDED SOON. I REALLY WANT MY SEXY CLOWN ASS POUNDED LIKE THERES NO TOMORROW.
[11:09] prefidentBUSH: oh jesus
[11:10] goodtimes93: I have yet to get the response back
[11:10] goodtimes93: My greeting? “HONK HONK!”
[11:10] goodtimes93: signed, Three Ring Richards”
[11:10] goodtimes93: i like the video
[11:11] goodtimes93: If we added subtitles we could go to Cannes
[11:12] prefidentBUSH: yea, im going to do more with the films, i just wanted to get the footage out there — as a music video — to see how it works. pretty soon, when i retire, i’m going to go all-out on these home movies, and make a fortune, and then pay for crazy clown sex
[11:12] goodtimes93: That is an amazing five year plan
[11:13] prefidentBUSH: yea, its the summary of my resume
[11:13] goodtimes93: Ack!
[11:13] goodtimes93: I have to go and learn some dope shiiiaaat
[11:14] goodtimes93: tonight is photography class
[11:14] goodtimes93: i have to bring in a picture
[11:14] goodtimes93: and talk about it
[11:14] goodtimes93: lol
[11:14] goodtimes93: its like first grade
[11:14] goodtimes93: “I like this picture because…”
[11:16] prefidentBUSH: take in a photo of a clown
[11:16] prefidentBUSH: that will result in great story
[11:16] prefidentBUSH: later
[11:16] goodtimes93: LOL
[11:16] goodtimes93: WOW
[11:17] goodtimes93: i hadn’t thought of that
[11:17] goodtimes93: maybe next time
[11:17] goodtimes93: I was going for Tim McGraw and Faith Hill
[11:17] goodtimes93: and comparing it to that photo of the sailor kissing the girl in time square from life magazine
[11:17] goodtimes93: but clown sex works too I guess
[11:17] prefidentBUSH: it ALWAYS works
[11:17] goodtimes93: MY teacher is so hot too
[11:17] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:18] goodtimes93: K man PEACE
October 21, 2007
[11:01] goodtimes93: I have your pictures at the tip of my hands!
[11:01] goodtimes93: I am making a website
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: otay
[11:01] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Email is incredible.
[11:01] goodtimes93: It is a cradle of lies
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: email is incredible
[11:01] prefidentBUSH: incredibly stupid
[11:02] goodtimes93: No way man
[11:02] goodtimes93: dude
[11:02] goodtimes93: its INSTANT
[11:02] prefidentBUSH: no email is cool
[11:02] prefidentBUSH: we get a long
[11:02] goodtimes93: If you just witnessed what went down here
[11:02] goodtimes93: you would aggreee with meee
[11:02] prefidentBUSH: wahts that
[11:03] goodtimes93: I was on the phone
[11:03] goodtimes93: and emailing confirmation numbers
[11:03] goodtimes93: BOOM
[11:03] goodtimes93: its there
[11:03] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:03] goodtimes93: I had about 1 fill minute of productivity
[11:03] goodtimes93: full
[11:03] goodtimes93: the only thing cooler, MAYBE, is drag and drop
[11:03] goodtimes93: which your IM wont let me do for your pictures
[11:04] prefidentBUSH: my im
[11:04] prefidentBUSH: or yours
[11:04] prefidentBUSH: there is always www.senduit.com
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: create a zip and send large files, for free
[11:05] goodtimes93: mine ses yours doesnt roll like that
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: disclaimer: i am a consultantto senduit.com
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: yea
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: i use meebo
[11:05] goodtimes93: im sure you do
[11:05] goodtimes93: and you also use a teleporter to travel
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: jeff — at — reycorp — dot — com
[11:05] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: be sure not to tell tim i think he’s hay
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: gay
[11:06] goodtimes93: i like HAY
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: that won’t go over well with the family
[11:06] goodtimes93: that could make great code
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:06] goodtimes93: “He’s a farmer!”
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: your hay, dude
[11:06] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:07] prefidentBUSH: how did u end up as a villain on the today show?
[11:07] goodtimes93: Al Roker is a HATER
[11:08] prefidentBUSH: let me guess
[11:08] prefidentBUSH: u were bangin al roker’s daughter
[11:08] goodtimes93: if only
[11:08] goodtimes93: she is whiter than me
[11:09] prefidentBUSH: hmm
[11:09] prefidentBUSH: not good for ure image
[11:10] goodtimes93: true
[11:10] prefidentBUSH: did u see tim’s gift to edyta?
[11:10] goodtimes93: yeah man its really awesome
[11:10] goodtimes93: Its STILL up
[11:10] prefidentBUSH: oh yea, i saw ure quote
[11:10] goodtimes93: although people have attempted to take it down
[11:11] prefidentBUSH: they know it’s fake
[11:11] goodtimes93: oh im sure
[11:11] goodtimes93: i am HUNG OVER
[11:12] goodtimes93: I was a ROTTEN designated driver
[11:12] goodtimes93: I failed
[11:12] goodtimes93: no one went anywhere
[11:12] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:13] goodtimes93: We stay at my friend’s house
[11:13] goodtimes93: this girl, Diane
[11:13] goodtimes93: now, I am a taken man
[11:13] prefidentBUSH: al roker’s daughter
[11:13] goodtimes93: HA
[11:13] prefidentBUSH: whiter than u
[11:13] goodtimes93: touche’
[11:13] goodtimes93: my buddy ray is dressed as “The Green Man”
[11:13] goodtimes93: all over the place
[11:13] goodtimes93: i am sleeping on the couch
[11:13] goodtimes93: and all I hear in the middle of the night is
[11:13] goodtimes93: “Trust Me!”
[11:14] goodtimes93: I nearly died trying not to laugh
[11:14] prefidentBUSH: waht
[11:15] goodtimes93: hahahahaha
[11:15] goodtimes93: Middle of the night
[11:15] goodtimes93: I hear some smacking noises
[11:15] goodtimes93: and a loud whisper
[11:15] goodtimes93: Trust Me!
[11:15] prefidentBUSH: oh jesus
[11:15] goodtimes93: I nearly shit
[11:15] goodtimes93: it was fn hilarious
[11:15] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:16] prefidentBUSH: it’s not tim and edyta though
[11:16] goodtimes93: noooooooo
[11:16] goodtimes93: Ray Tarnowski
[11:16] goodtimes93: If you go to my facebook page
[11:16] prefidentBUSH: oh ray
[11:16] goodtimes93: its in the picts
[11:16] goodtimes93: he is
[11:16] goodtimes93: yeah
[11:18] prefidentBUSH: how do i find photos
[11:18] prefidentBUSH: in facebook
[11:18] goodtimes93: go to profile
[11:18] prefidentBUSH: done
[11:18] goodtimes93: view photos
[11:18] goodtimes93: its on the left hand side of the screen
[11:19] prefidentBUSH: hmm…
[11:19] goodtimes93: perhaps under applications
[11:19] goodtimes93: under the search bar
[11:19] prefidentBUSH: okay
[11:19] goodtimes93: under the facebook logo
[11:19] prefidentBUSH: then i need to find ure album
[11:19] goodtimes93: i dont have one
[11:19] goodtimes93: oh wow
[11:19] goodtimes93: ok i see what ur saying
[11:20] prefidentBUSH: it’s pretty lame
[11:20] prefidentBUSH: facebook photos
[11:20] prefidentBUSH: not like myspace
[11:20] goodtimes93: yeah
[11:20] goodtimes93: check my ‘feed’
[11:20] goodtimes93: “Social Networking” websites are the shit
[11:20] goodtimes93: i have wasted countless precious time on them
[11:21] goodtimes93: oh man
[11:21] goodtimes93: I have to try and shake this
[11:21] goodtimes93: perhaps eating unhealthy food will assist
[11:22] goodtimes93: I am just gladd I didnt do anything stupid in my drunken state
[11:22] goodtimes93: Especially when I fell asleep next to the large breasted hairdresser
[11:22] prefidentBUSH: good luck
[11:22] prefidentBUSH: jesus
[11:22] prefidentBUSH: what an evening
[11:22] goodtimes93: yeah man
[11:22] goodtimes93: it was fucking wild
[11:22] goodtimes93: we crashed a wedding
[11:22] goodtimes93: in costume
[11:22] goodtimes93: I had to use the bathroom
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: oh man
[11:23] goodtimes93: and it was the only doors open
[11:23] goodtimes93: i Bline
[11:23] goodtimes93: the bride grabs ray and starts taking pictures
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: oh lord
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: she didnt realize
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: or she did
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: obviously, u guys were in costume
[11:23] goodtimes93: a 6’4” guy in tight LIME green spandex
[11:23] prefidentBUSH: but she thought it was funny
[11:23] goodtimes93: she LOVED it
[11:23] goodtimes93: they were all wasted
[11:24] goodtimes93: and I hadn’t crapped in my pants
[11:24] goodtimes93: life was good
[11:24] goodtimes93: Please send Snickers and your lovely wife my regards
[11:25] prefidentBUSH: thanks
[11:25] goodtimes93: i will show you my website when it is done
[11:25] goodtimes93: www.christopherwrichards.com
[11:25] prefidentBUSH: whatis called
[11:25] prefidentBUSH: that was easy
[11:26] goodtimes93: yeah
[11:26] goodtimes93: i am making a false website to back the lies on my resume so I can get a good job
[11:26] goodtimes93: excuse me, support the stretches of truth etc
[11:26] prefidentBUSH: haha
[11:26] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Email is incredible.
[11:27] goodtimes93: if you didnt know they were lies
[11:27] goodtimes93: even you would be fooled
[11:27] goodtimes93: youll see
October 23, 2007
[18:38] goodtimes93: There is this great adult film called blackdraft
[18:38] goodtimes93: a fireman bursts through the door and says, “WHERE’S THE FIRE!?”
[18:39] goodtimes93: pan to a man glistening on the couch who retorts: “Its in my pants.”
[18:39] goodtimes93: With that the fireman informs his fellow firefighters to head back to the station because he is going to take care of this
[18:39] goodtimes93: I found that relative to your local events
[21:14] prefidentBUSH: are you making light of the devastating wildfires that have engulfed southern california?
[21:14] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93)
aggro1982 (9:45:42 PM): i was on the today show 4 years ago…intoxicated of course, binge drinking before going to see bea arthur, a “one woman show”.
aggro1982 (9:46:06 PM): i kept on screaming at her in the end “YOU STOLE THE SHOW BEA, YOU STOLE THE SHOW”.
[21:14] prefidentBUSH: i hope not
November 1, 2007
[22:24] prefidentBUSH: how is the .com coming along?
[22:24] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) I had to review my ‘academic history’ for a job application…
Trust me when I say, there was nothing academic or historic about it, except for that fact that I graduated.. now THAT was historic
[09:05] goodtimes93: about as well as you getting your pictures
[09:05] goodtimes93: but its going
[13:58] goodtimes93: the lamest website on planet earth is now up:
[13:58] goodtimes93: www.christopherwrichards.com
[13:59] goodtimes93: its no redtube, but it works
[14:15] goodtimes93: well
[14:15] goodtimes93: not yet
[14:15] goodtimes93: but shortly!
November 8, 2007
[20:02] goodtimes93: Tim Riley is such a little shit
[20:19] prefidentBUSH: word
[20:19] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Tonight I discovered that after years of singing “KANGAROO LOVE! OH YOU JUST HAVE TO WAIT!” It turns out, the true lyrics are actually “You can’t hurry love, oh you just have to wait.” Damn you Wayne Brady.
[20:20] prefidentBUSH: that website of yours is hilarious
[20:20] prefidentBUSH: i mean ridiculously ugly
[20:21] prefidentBUSH: are u a party planner
[20:21] prefidentBUSH: is that for school
[20:23] prefidentBUSH: i hope so
[20:29] goodtimes93: dude, I am an event planner
[20:29] goodtimes93: parties are great, but I turn that shit out
[20:29] goodtimes93: dude, its so gay
[20:29] goodtimes93: i am seriously in the 1800’s
[20:30] goodtimes93: that is like the moonlanding for me
November 12, 2007
[19:32] prefidentBUSH: dude
[19:32] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) giving my poor brain some rest!
[19:32] prefidentBUSH: that’s what she said
[19:44] prefidentBUSH: i’ve got a new message…
[19:44] prefidentBUSH: for the kids…
[19:44] prefidentBUSH: Don’t smoke dope, make hemp rope.
February 6, 2008
Wednesday, February 6, 2008 10:30:26
[10:30] prefidentBUSH: i got a check plus too
[10:30] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) I got a “check plus” in my first paper for my women’s study class! In case you were wondering: this is better than a simple “check” and far superior to the dreaded “check minus.”
Clearly the risk I took comparing Soulja Boy’s vernacular in Crank That to “Counter life” feminist literature paid off.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008 16:53:49
[16:53] goodtimes93: great idea for a new ‘non-profit’ org
[16:54] prefidentBUSH: yea…
[16:54] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) I got a “check plus” in my first paper for my women’s study class! In case you were wondering: this is better than a simple “check” and far superior to the dreaded “check minus.”
Clearly the risk I took comparing Soulja Boy’s vernacular in Crank That to “Counter life” feminist literature paid off.
[16:54] goodtimes93: donate your car to people who had D.U.I.’s and have their licenses taken away
[16:54] goodtimes93: D.W.I.’s as well, of course
[16:54] prefidentBUSH: that’s a horrible idea
[16:54] prefidentBUSH: stay in school
[16:54] goodtimes93: you’re a fool!
[16:55] goodtimes93: think of all the second offenses!
[16:55] goodtimes93: giving those lonely housewives of MADD something to do by picketing drunks houses
[16:55] goodtimes93: its win win
[16:55] goodtimes93: think about it
[16:55] prefidentBUSH: what’s your major again?
[16:55] goodtimes93: Ill have my masters of liberal arts in a year
[16:56] prefidentBUSH: and giving away cars to drunks is a liberal art
[16:56] goodtimes93: no, conservative
[16:56] prefidentBUSH: haha
[16:56] goodtimes93: there are only SO MANY CARS
[16:56] goodtimes93: YULC YUCK YUCK
[16:57] goodtimes93: OK, I am off to the store to buy some soy milk
[16:57] goodtimes93: aren’t I hip?
[16:57] prefidentBUSH: heard tim finally came out of closet
[16:57] goodtimes93: no way!
[16:57] goodtimes93: no he didnt
[16:57] goodtimes93: I write him haikus almost daily
[16:57] goodtimes93: send him emails
[16:57] goodtimes93: texts
[16:57] goodtimes93: that little fucker SELDOM responds
[16:57] goodtimes93: he is such a douche bag sometimes
[16:57] goodtimes93: I talk to you more than him
[16:58] prefidentBUSH: times change
[16:58] prefidentBUSH: he works now
[16:58] goodtimes93: so do i
[16:58] prefidentBUSH: and edyta is going to school
[16:58] goodtimes93: EXACTLY
[16:58] prefidentBUSH: it will be a rough period for him
[16:58] goodtimes93: he should have MORE time
[16:58] goodtimes93: oh please
[16:58] goodtimes93: grad school is a fucking joke
[16:58] goodtimes93: its so easy
[16:58] goodtimes93: there is more work or whatever
[16:58] goodtimes93: and its denser
[16:59] goodtimes93: but its not THAT hard
[16:59] goodtimes93: she is fine
[16:59] goodtimes93: he is just LAME
[16:59] prefidentBUSH: yea, i agree
[16:59] prefidentBUSH: anyway, he’s still in the closet
[16:59] prefidentBUSH: i was only kidding
[16:59] goodtimes93: ha
[16:59] goodtimes93: hey man
[16:59] goodtimes93: all is good in the hood
[16:59] goodtimes93: oh
[16:59] goodtimes93: before I dash
[17:00] goodtimes93: Im entering some art in this show for friday
[17:00] goodtimes93: I am excited about it
[17:00] prefidentBUSH: i have no money
[17:00] goodtimes93: a big ass painting
[17:00] goodtimes93: niether do i
[17:00] goodtimes93: dude, at least you have assets
[17:00] goodtimes93: house
[17:00] goodtimes93: dog
[17:00] goodtimes93: etc
[17:00] prefidentBUSH: haha
[17:00] prefidentBUSH: dog
[17:00] goodtimes93: arf!
[17:00] goodtimes93: tell your loving wife I send my regards
[17:00] goodtimes93: you are a lucky man
[17:00] goodtimes93: you could even tell her that tonight
[17:01] goodtimes93: “You know, I am a lucky man.”
[17:01] goodtimes93: that will go miles sir
[17:01] prefidentBUSH: haha
[17:01] goodtimes93: I may not know much, but I know the ladies
[17:01] goodtimes93: k dude
[17:01] goodtimes93: ill catch up w u soon
[17:01] goodtimes93: PEACE
[17:01] prefidentBUSH: later
[17:01] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) I got a “check plus” in my first paper for my women’s study class! In case you were wondering: this is better than a simple “check” and far superior to the dreaded “check minus.”
Clearly the risk I took comparing Soulja Boy’s vernacular in Crank That to “Counter life” feminist literature paid off.
February 20, 2008
[08:33] prefidentBUSH: you are so gay
[08:33] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) To Do:
Women’s Studies
Weekly Paper/readings
Term Paper Draft
Colonialism Presentation
Hit on my partner for my colonialism presentation
Theatre
Write Scene for “Dante’s Infernodelphia”
Performance Arts
Revise Op-Ed piece
Read Arthur Miller
Hit on my Performance Arts Teacher
Graduate Assistance
Prepare presentation for a senior seminar on networking
[08:34] goodtimes93: thanks lover
[08:35] prefidentBUSH: good luck with your presentation for a senior seminar on networking…
[08:35] prefidentBUSH: with gays
[08:35] goodtimes93: HA!
[08:35] goodtimes93: i actually have a networking horror story
[08:35] goodtimes93: he thought it was a date
[08:35] goodtimes93: …
[08:35] prefidentBUSH: and also, the best of luck, hitting on your gay colonialism partner
[08:35] goodtimes93: AND SO DID I!
[08:35] goodtimes93: OHHH YEAH!
[08:35] goodtimes93: touche’
[08:35] goodtimes93: thats kind of the point
[08:35] prefidentBUSH: you mean, two guys
[08:35] prefidentBUSH: you were networking
[08:36] prefidentBUSH: and you both thought you were on a date
[08:36] goodtimes93: we worked the nets all night long!
[08:36] goodtimes93: in undergrad some guy I ran into sed he worked for ABC
[08:36] goodtimes93: i sed “oh im a comm major”
[08:36] goodtimes93: he sed
[08:36] goodtimes93: lets do coffee maybe I can get you an intern
[08:36] goodtimes93: he expected more
[08:36] prefidentBUSH: ure right, “sed” is much more easy than “said”
[08:37] goodtimes93: i did not become an ABC intern
[08:37] goodtimes93: it is
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: haha
[08:37] goodtimes93: and fashionable
[08:37] goodtimes93: the less you type, the longer your keys last
[08:37] goodtimes93: its better for the environment
[08:37] prefidentBUSH: haha
[08:37] goodtimes93: al gore just got an erection
[08:37] goodtimes93: THANKS CHRIS!
[08:37] goodtimes93: NO PROBLEM AL!
[08:38] goodtimes93: how is BHBJ?
[08:38] prefidentBUSH: i haven’t seen him in awhile, i’m sure he’s shrooming his ass off, no, i’m only joking, he’s got a lot of work he’s involved with, but the money’s good, let’s you eat fungi grown on cowshit, whenever you want
[08:39] goodtimes93: ahhh
[08:40] goodtimes93: good im glad he is working hard and making some bucks
[08:40] prefidentBUSH: edyta is coming out here in early march, lucky for us, however, that gayrod tim riley isn’t joining her.
[08:40] goodtimes93: that IS lucky for you
[08:40] goodtimes93: Edyta is great
[08:40] goodtimes93: he is a shit
[08:40] prefidentBUSH: haha
[08:40] goodtimes93: I write him haikus
[08:40] goodtimes93: doesnt respong
[08:40] goodtimes93: d
[08:40] goodtimes93: emails
[08:40] goodtimes93: texts
[08:40] goodtimes93: nothing
[08:40] goodtimes93: Edyta is my favorite person in that couple
[08:41] prefidentBUSH: it’s that butt-plug, it is distracting him
[08:41] goodtimes93: HA!
[08:41] goodtimes93: i seriously fear when he gets called for my reference for the tour for the cure
[08:41] goodtimes93: Tim, a.k.a. Mr. personality
[08:42] prefidentBUSH: haha
[08:42] goodtimes93: in my interview I have to craft in how he is one of those people who is really smart but quiet
[08:42] goodtimes93: w/o me sounding like an AHOLE
[08:42] goodtimes93: but explaining they will be calling a professional tool
[08:42] goodtimes93: its a fine line to tread
[08:43] prefidentBUSH: tell them to talk about the phillis
[08:43] prefidentBUSH: phillies
[08:43] goodtimes93: the phillies are fucking retarded
[08:44] goodtimes93: they are treating ryan howard like an asshole
[08:44] goodtimes93: they should give him 11-million instead of the ten he asked for
[08:44] goodtimes93: he puts asses in the seats!
[08:44] prefidentBUSH: how would tim riley treat ryan howard
[08:44] goodtimes93: give him a limp handshake
[08:44] prefidentBUSH: these are the questions you should be asking
[08:44] goodtimes93: and say, how much will you pay us to let you play for the phillies?
[08:45] goodtimes93: thats how tim would treat ryan howard
[08:45] goodtimes93: i would give him 11-million and two asian women for the grandest happy ending of his life
[08:45] goodtimes93: he could sign his contract as part of a massive pearl necklace given to the asian women
[08:45] prefidentBUSH: yea, and turn that into a reality series for espn2
[08:46] goodtimes93: HA
[08:46] prefidentBUSH: “happy endings”
[08:46] goodtimes93: id watch that
[08:46] goodtimes93: the one guy who doesnt juice but can hit
[08:46] goodtimes93: dont even get me started on that
[08:46] goodtimes93: philly’s only hope at a title shot and they want to fuck it up
[08:47] goodtimes93: now im enraged
[08:47] goodtimes93: okok i have to go
[08:47] goodtimes93: motherfers
[08:47] goodtimes93: Jesus
[08:47] goodtimes93: i need to displace this anger into my feminist theory papers
[08:47] prefidentBUSH: later
[08:47] goodtimes93: see ya holmes
March 1, 2008
[22:41] prefidentBUSH: u are so gay
[22:41] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) Been having a bunch of computer and internet issues-
Trying to see if my AIM will actually stay up
Sunday, March 2, 2008 14:06:39
[14:06] goodtimes93: [Offline IM sent 6h and 7m ago] thanks!
[14:06] goodtimes93: [Offline IM sent 6h and 7m ago] Oh and P.S.
[14:06] goodtimes93: [Offline IM sent 6h and 7m ago] what “HILL” are you on exactly?
[14:06] goodtimes93: [Offline IM sent 6h and 7m ago] THE BUTT HILL!?
[17:47] goodtimes93: If you wouldn’t enjoy it so much
[17:48] goodtimes93: I was going to place a personal ad with your contact information in it
[17:48] goodtimes93: a really steamy ad
[17:49] goodtimes93: I would describe you as a rugged man
[17:49] goodtimes93: with a soft heart
[17:54] goodtimes93: “don’t mind the lady who claims she is my wife, just call back later”
[17:54] goodtimes93: “I am her caregiver”
[18:46] prefidentBUSH: haha
[18:46] goodtimes93 (auto-response from goodtimes93) trying to melt the iron hearts of the feminists…
[18:51] prefidentBUSH: yea, gay
[18:51] prefidentBUSH: i know
Dead, Home From Iraq, A Best Friend
My best friend in first and second grade has died. The obituary in my hometown paper — the esteemed Buffalo News — only says that Justin Reyes had “died unexpectedly” two-months-plus back. My parents informed me of the news — asking me if I knew the person — over a phone call two days ago. I told them, “Yes, in fact, he was my best friend in second grade.” Most likely, my friend committed suicide.
The paper mentions that Justin had “served in the U.S. Army for eight years, initially stationed along the DMZ in South Korea, and then deployed to Iraq during Operation Iraqi Freedom.” It adds that Justin “was the recipient of many commendation medals and awards for meritorious service as a Team Leader and Squad Leader for Charlie Company.” And, that Justin “sustained multiple combat related injuries and, as a result, retired in May 2007.”
Our friendship faded after second grade, not because of choice, but more so because at that age, friendship and even best-friendship was governed by your homeroom classmates (and neighborhood proximity). And as the years went by, and as our homerooms and neighborhoods remained distant, our childhood best-friendship became a friendship, and then just an acquaintanceship with a history. I remember randomly meeting Justin senior year in high school, and smoking some marijuana, laughing (of course) about how we used to play in the field and classroom of our elementary school, and now — well, all things come full circle. We graduated from high school together; I never saw or heard from him again.
Awhile back, I happened upon Justin’s MySpace profile (alright, I was MySpace lurking). I wanted to say “hello,” but thought that would be weird, so I didn’t, and now I wish I did. If I could go back in time, I would want to write this to him — in an email or a post on his wall or comment board — “Hey Justin, it’s me Jeff. How are you doing? I see that you fought in Iraq, I am glad that you are alright, safe at home. Although I am not an outward supporter of the war, I do most certainly support the troops, especially you. I love you to death.”
A photo on his MySpace profile shows my old buddy (on the right) in Ramadi:
But I remember him from my (must-have-been) first-grade birthday party at the local roller skating rink, the best of the best places to have a party (that’s Justin, front and center, and my silly older brother to the left):
In second grade, Justin and I spent one week (when you’re young, a week is like a semester, and a summer is like a decade) shaving the colored coating off of all our pencils — yellow, red, blue, green — with our scissors (child-safety scissors, I am sure), resulting in pencils that were the color of the underlying wood. Our classmates all wanted them, and some even said they would pay for them (with what money, let’s just not think about that). Justin and I thought about starting a business with the apparent prospects of this bold venture. The student teacher even said he would like to use the shavings for his art projects (although he was most likely humoring us, as all second-grade student teachers tend to do). But there we had it, we were a zero-waste company in the making, based out of our desks in second-grade homeroom. (Of course, as fate would have it, “natural pencils” became all the rage, and the big guys would have pushed us out of the market anyway.)
In pace requiescat.
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Team Ordinance: Automatic Invite
A player will receive an automatic invitation if he appears in four or more games the previous season.
This ordinance is premised on the “first season’s precedent” theory. The minimum games played by players in the first season was four. It makes sense to establish that as a minimum, as that represents one-third of scheduled games, a rational minimum.
As the Superbas move forward, it is imperative to recruit new players that will make the games, not only to avoid nasty forfeitures, but also to encourage better game-play, and to improve player morale.
All team ordinances — all four of them — are available on the website.
Coach’s Notes — Game 22
- I didn’t post the statistics and leaders because, well, I’m lazy. But I will confirm that the softball Jesus still leads almost all categories. (However, that Jesus guy can sure be an asshole.)
– A question from the field: “Why are you running ads on the blog, I thought this was a non-profit?” »» Yes, Superbas.org is a not-for-profit organization, however, recouping expenses (hosting fees, etc.) is allowed, and makes sound business sense. That, and I love the sound of a chain basketball net. (It is the only way I play.)
– Daniel (or Hernandez* from last game) will join us for next week’s game. I’m trying to convince Damien (or Adams*) to join us again.
– Speaking of which, it is nice to have another week off, resting our tired bodies, coming in refreshed, ready to make a run for the playoffs.
– I’ve adopted a new team ordinance, which will make four in all. I’ll post that shortly.
– Please let me know if you are interested in the fall league, I am sure we will get information on registration, costs, etc., soon.
– And Tim Evans’ offer to host the team banquet, er, keg party, still stands, with information to follow. Strikeouts will fund the bash.
-Jeff